


Virginity, obliviousness, anxiety, school, and memes

by Zyrocs



Category: Lore Olympus (Webcomic)
Genre: Chatting & Messaging, I’m bad at tagging, Multi, Other, no beta we die like jason
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-12-04
Updated: 2021-02-11
Packaged: 2021-03-09 22:35:51
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 8
Words: 1,575
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27883885
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Zyrocs/pseuds/Zyrocs
Summary: Petit Flower: WhatHa-ha-hades: She thought that you and me were in a sex cult.AroAce: Well exCUSE ME if i thought that
Relationships: Aphrodite/Ares (Lore Olympus), Athena/Hestia (Lore Olympus), Echo/Hera (Lore Olympus), Hades/Persephone (Lore Olympus), Hecate/Harem
Comments: 34
Kudos: 48





	1. and it begins

**Author's Note:**

> i haven’t seen a chat fic for this fandom so i’m making one and honestly it’s easier  
> the sexual tension between hades and persephone honestly

Artemis added Persephone to TGOEM

Hestia: Hello, Persephone! So glad to see you here! I wonder, why did it take you so long to join our little group-chat?

Persephone: Oh, I actually didn’t have a phone until Artemis gave me her old one! Sorry! 

Athena: Oh, that’s fine!   
  


* * *

Moontwin added Persephone to Gods Of Olympus 

Manwhore: sup

Ha-ha-hades: Hello, Persephone 

Persephone: Hello!

Manwhore: get that proper punctuation and spelling outta here we dont know them

Persephone: ok

TheRealRuler: change your name to something that describes you

Persephone: I’m sorry, I don’t know how.

Manwhore: WHAT DID I SAY ABOUT PROPER GRAMMAR but chill ill do it for you

Manwhore changed Persephone to Petit Flower

Petit Flower: who is manwhore?

Manwhore: Zeus.

Petit Flower

Moontwin: @everyone Come introduce

Suntwin: Apollo, god of the sun, hottest bachelor 

Petit Flower added Future Persephone 

Petit Flower: I DIDNT DO THAT HELP

Manwhore: It’s chill who are you

Future Persephone: Look at my name

TheRealRuler: SCAM

Future Persephone: Break up with Minthe

TheRealRuler kicked Future Persephone

Manwhore: @Ha-ha-hades looking real quiet

TheNiceOne: Hello, Persephone! It’s Hestia!

TheSmartOne: Hi! It’s Athena, here.

Manwhore: they are the exception to the rule

Moontwin changed their name to AroAce

Ha-ha-hades: its time to swim and hopefully go to bed(((:))((:)))

Manwhore: WHAT IS THAT also bedtime can i have choccy milk

* * *

Private Message between Persephone and Hades

Persephone: Hello!

Hades: Hello

Persephone: Have a good night!

Hades: You too.


	2. 🔫😃 spanish or vanish

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> they talk about duoslingo

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> fuck me im tired also, i remeber, back in the olden days of early ao3 lo fics, waiting for more fics so yall get something ✨new✨

Sparky to Bros before Hoes

Sparky: ...

DeathTheKid: I swear, if you’re fucking a mortal.

Sparky: i’m fucking a mortal

DeathTheKid: WHAT DID I JUST SAY

Broseidon: chill just hear him out 

DeathTheKid changed his name to why?

why?: ok i’m out

* * *

TheRealRuler to Gods of Olympus

TheRealRuler: RED ALERT: Zeus is a little bitch who can’t stay flaccid

AroAce: we don’t need to know your sex habits

Arrows: grandma i can tell you who zeus is fucking for the right price

Heehoo: 😳drama 

TheRealRuler: aphrodite shut the fuck up

TheSmartOne: I WAS DRUNK AND CURSED OUT HERMES IN NORSE AND NOW DUOS IS REPEATING EVERYTHING

Petit Flower: Maybe....give him sentience? Like a humans level of sentience? And make him immortal, god of languages

TheSmartOne: That’s a good idea!

Petit Flower: Why did you curse out Hermes?

TheSmartOne: He painted my Duos neon green

AroAce: Hold up, who is Duos?

TheSmartOne: My owl

TheSmartOne: I’ll be right back, I just need to instill his immortality 

Manwhore: What’d I miss?

Ha-ha-hades: Eros snitched on you

Ha-ha-hades: If you like being alive, hide.

Manwhore: fuck

TheSmartOne: He made an app on the Pom Store...

TheSmartOne: Uncle?

Ha-ha-hades: Only because your birthday is coming up.

Petit Flower: I got it! I want to learn Latin!

Manwhore: MANDATORY SHUT DOWN OF CHAT. REASON: HERA IS ABOUT TO MURDER ME

* * *

Two days later

Suntwin: Damn, that blew up

TheSmartOne: Someone missed their spanish lessons two days in a row and now he’s saying ‘Spanish or Vanish’

Suntwin: .....

TheSmartOne: It was you?!

Suntwin: In my defense, I am the god of too much?

Petit Flower added Future Persephone

Petit Flower: Not again...

Future Persephone: You have no excuse. Perish.

TheRealRuler kicked Future Persephone

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> nice


	3. S P A N I S H O R V A N I S H

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> TheSmartOne: ASSPOLLOOOOOOOOO  
> Suntwin: that isn’t my name  
> TheSmartOne changed Suntwin’s name to Suntwit  
> Suntwit: hey

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> you get crack you get crack and you have you heard of our lord and savior crack  
> can i get tag recs

TheSmartOne to Gods of Olympus

TheSmartOne: ASSPOLLOOOOOOOOO

Suntwin: that isn’t my name

TheSmartOne changed Suntwin’s name to Suntwit 

Suntwit: hey

TheSmartOne: I’m not the one who has Duos in a frenzy

TheSmartOne: I HAD TO COMMISION HEPHAESTUS FOR CAGE SO HE DIDNT ESCAPE AND HUNT YOU DOWN DO YOU KNOW HOW SERIOUS THIS IS

Suntwit: I literally drive the sun, am the best healer, have the best music, and so many other things

TheSmartOne: NOT FOR MUCH LONGER YOU WONT UNLESS YOU TAKE YOUR FKING SPANISH LESSONS

TheSmartOne added Future Persephone 

TheSmartOne: That was on purpose

Future Persephone: Asspollhoe, good luck explaining that one.

Future Persephone was kicked by Future Persephone

Suntwit: THE FUCHRJRYIQKANSSGDGEEYEY

TheSmartOne: He escaped... have fun.

* * *

Sparky to Bros before Hoes

DeathTheKid: I swear, if you’re fucking yet another mortal

Sparky: I’m fucking Semele

Broseidon: Ares and Aphrodite are going to kill you

Sparky: Not until they find out

Broseidon: You really went 😃🔫😃

Sparky: yeah bro

Broseidon: bro

Sparky: bro

why?: bye

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hey asspollhoe stfu  
> i just realized this could work under the ancient greek religion and lore except apollo NORMALLY is a soft bean that we love, ASSPOLLHOE HOWEVER is a demon that crawled out of the depths of tartar sauce  
> short i know i’ll add more later k


	4. so i was sittting there

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> AroAce: friends. i come to say shut the fUCK UP.  
> Manwhore: chill bitch  
> AroAce: BOI IF YOU DONT-

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> dummy thicc uwu chiwon

AroAce to Gods of Olympus 

AroAce: friends. i come to say shut the fUCK UP.

Manwhore: chill bitch

AroAce: BOI IF YOU DONT-

Petit Flower: ?

AroAce: Perse my best friend my (future) ace buddy what are you doing in this depraved sex crazed godly swamp you are innocent

Petit Flower added Future Persephone

Future Persephone: If only you knew...

AroAce kicked Future Persephone 

Petit Flower: Why, just why?

* * *

biguwuundrwrldmommy added Persephone to Underworld Gods

biguwuundrwrldmommy: we are all depraved

Persephone changed Persephone’s name to bbq sauce 

bbq sauce: hi! i’m tired gn 

* * *

Hades to Hecate

Hades: Stop fucking random nymphs

Hecate: how bout i do ✨anyway✨

Hades: GOODNIGHT.

* * *

biguwuundrwrldmommy changed her name to ThatBitch

ThatBitch: my mine chants ‘You aren’t immune to propaganda’ when dummy thicc uwu hera walks by 

whiteasdeath: _Did i fucking ask_

ThatBitch: I’m your boss so yes

RedMint: No

ThatBitch: I said SHUT THE FUCK UP

bbq sauce: sksksksksksksksksksk

ThatBitch: Hi Persephone! 

bbq sauce: hello!

RedMint: Oh.....hello

ThatBitch: How many dumb bihs does it take to slap dem alien cheeks

bbq sauce: ?

ThatBitch: Future thing

bbq sauce: ah

bbq sauce: is that why ‘Future Persephone’ keeps coming into my phone?

_bbq sauce deleted one message_

ThatBitch: Say something Persephone

bbq sauce: ok

whiteasdeath: mmmmmmMMMMMMMMMM

bbq sauce: What happened?

whiteasdeath: another fking god caused death

whiteasdeath: 300 OF THEM

whiteasdeath: eros murder time

redboi: you don’t do shit

whiteasdeath: you high?

redboi: i mighta been on that pack

whiteasdeath: i’m coming to pick you up.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i’m tired piece  
> tag recs  
> pls  
> k  
> u  
> d  
> o  
> s  
> a  
> n  
> d  
> c  
> o  
> m  
> m  
> e  
> n  
> t  
> s  
> f  
> e  
> e  
> d  
> m  
> y  
> s  
> o  
> u  
> l  
> also, underworld gods can see and go into the future. change my fking mind


	5. barbecue sauce on my titties

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Manwhore: uhhhh aphrodite got 🅱️iddes   
> TheRealRuler: ......  
> Manwhore: I DIDNT MEAN IT LIKE THAT  
> Tw for toxic relationships

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> READ THE LAST CHAPTER. I added more

Manwhore to Gods of Olympus

Manwhore: uhhhh aphrodite got 🅱️iddes

TheRealRuler: ......

Manwhore: I DIDNT MEAN IT LIKE THAT

Heehoo: thank you ig

Arrows: ffs don’t talk abt my moms boobs in this chat i sucked on them as a child

Broseidon: I did it first

Manwhore: I did it too

AroAce: STOP TURNING THIS INTO A ‘WHO FUCKED APHRODITE’ CONTEST YALL ARE DISGUSTING

* * *

ThatBitch to Underworld Gods

ThatBitch: @redboi U good

redboi: yeah 

ThatBitch: where’d you even get weed? 

redboi: Demeter does shit

whiteasdeath: w h a t

bbq sauce: \\(._.(\

redboi: fuck i guess no more weed for me

RedOne: ya think?

redboi: yeah

RedOne: that was rhetorical you dumb fucking bitch

RedOne: u g h

* * *

Bitch to Slut

Bitch: You said he was gonna leave her?

Slut: Shut up.

Slut: I’m working on it. How about Hades? Hows that working for you, huh?

Bitch: Touchè.

Slut: You are worthless, anyway, Why does he want you?

_Slut deleted one message._

_Bitch: Don’t you think I know that?_

_Send message?_

_Message Unsent._

* * *

Broseidon to Bros before Hoes

Broseidon: Can you set me and Amphi with Hecate?

Why?: No.

Why? changed his name to ActuallyDead

Sparky: Why notttt

ActuallyDead: She only fucks women

Broseidon: Then set her up with Amphi ig

ActuallyDead: When’s her birthday?

Broseidon: In 3 weeks

ActuallyDead: I’ll seem like such a hypocrite, but I’ll ask

Sparky: why would you be a hypocrite

ActuallyDead: ....Maybe the last message i sent her was to stop fucking nymphs?

ActuallyDead: I’m not calling your wife a nymph she is a very powerful goddess in her own right

Broseidon: good

* * *

Hades to Hecate

Hades: Poseidon wants me ask you to fuck his wife

Hecate: Hell yeah

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i’m gay and mom is a queerphobe  
> also fuck thetis chosen bros before jealous hoes


	6. 🏳️🌈someone caught the gay disease

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Broseidon: HELP ME I FOUNG MY WKFE FHBKING HECATE  
> Broseidon: i mean kinda hot BUT STILL

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> yall i’m not a homophobe k  
> also, look at my chapter titles for 4 and 5 and i’m sorry for no update yesterday exams are a bitch  
> tw for abusive marriage at the end

Broseidon to Bros before Hoes

Broseidon: HELP ME I FOUNG MY WKFE FHBKING HECATE

Broseidon: i mean kinda hot BUT STILL

ActuallyDead: We did not need to know that

Sparky: you rlly went 👁 🔫

👄

Broseidon: you dare use my own memes against me

Sparky: Yes

ActuallyDead changed Sparky’s name to Stupid #1

Stupid #1: HEY

ActuallyDead changed Broseidon’s name to Stupid #2

Stupid #2: I mean valid BUT IM STILL OFFENDED

* * *

Hades to Hecate

Hades: My brother thought it would be nice to inform me of your excursions

Hecate: it was hot

Hades: BYE.

* * *

Hecate to Amphitrite

Hecate: do u wanna do that again bc i s i m p

Amphitrite: ok bby

Hecate changed Amphitrite’s name to Big Momma🥵🥵🥵

Big Momma🥵🥵🥵 changed their name to 👀👀👀

* * *

TheSmartOne: Hey @Suntwit, how’s not taking spanish going for you

_Suntwit sent injured.png_

TheSmartOne: jjfjkfnfnrjd that’s your own fault puffy eyed split lipped pussy ass BITCH.

TheSmartOne: Also i’m gay as fUck

Amphi: Aren’t we all?

TheRealRuler: i mean valid

TheRealRuler: @Manwhore I want a divorce

Manwhore: haha no

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> aaaaaaaaaaaaa  
> COMMENT PLEASE I LOVE THEM  
> also please kudos  
> also, regarding smut? yeah no i’m a wild ace   
> even tho i make the most innuendos out of all my friends  
> by the way the title is supposed to be a gay flag it just took the rainbow out of the flag so it’s now a white flag with a rainbow next to it


	7. hey there ghosts it me ya boi

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> ThatBitch: aaaaaaa
> 
> bbbq sauce: me too, hecate, me too

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sorry lol it’s been a ride  
> ALSO, tell me: should i take a 2 week hiatus, and repurpose this whole story following the plot of lo, with weekly 1k(at least) chapters or keep writing this shitshow

ThatBitch: aaaaaaa

bbq sauce: me too, hecate, me too

whiteasdeath: hermes u ok

redboi: yeah bro

whiteasdeath: bro

redboi: bro

ThatBitch: hermes pls

ThatBitch: stfu

ThatBitch: don’t make zy delete us

ThatBitch deleted one message 

whiteasdeath: who tf is zy 

ThatBitch: what do you mean zy i know no zy

bbq sauce: sometimes, i wonder why the mortal world isn’t as advanced, and then i look at you, and realize.

ThatBitch: ughhhhhh

* * *

Petit Flower to Gods of Olympus

Petit Flower changed their name to proserp

proserp: athena, latin is killing me

TheSmartOne: oof, sorry i don’t control that haha

proserp: i’ll make you baklava 

TheSmartOne: i’ll get duos right on it

Manwhore: yo who tf 

Suntwit: persie you never visit me

proserp: maybe because i have school? i don’t want to

AroAce changed their name to fuckthisbeahunter

fuckthisbeahunter: i’m tired pls

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> please comment


	8. hey there ghosts it me ya boi

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> ThatBitch: aaaaaaa
> 
> bbbq sauce: me too, hecate, me too

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sorry lol it’s been a ride  
> ALSO, tell me: should i take a 2 week hiatus, and repurpose this whole story following the plot of lo, with weekly 1k(at least) chapters or keep writing this shitshow

ok fuck also poll: should i rewrite this story with plot? it would come in may but much more structured, or should i keep it like this and then cut it off at 45 chapters

**Author's Note:**

> so there it’s is


End file.
